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Show/hide Jany 18, 1862 You at home have finished your baked beans & what do you think your trainer son & brother has had & where so you think he is. I answer the last first - I am still on board the good ship H. J. Brookman she is anchored off Hatteras Inlet, that is half way between the cape & Occracock Inlet, it is where Genl Butler went with his first expedition, how well I remember Ed clapp's telling me the news in the church porch one Sunday morning, we thought Genl Butler had done a big thing and as I recall it I think I must be back there in the old church rather than down here pitching up & down. As to my supper to night - we had salt junk, salt tongue, salt fish, pickles bread & gingerbread with tea. The captain feeds us very well real sailors (cabin not wealthy) fare everything salt of course. one of our favorite dishes served regularly at breakfast & dinner, is the stew which emits an odor of onions which is anything but agreeable to one who is experiencing for the first time the rolling & tumbling of a life on the ocean wave. I used to think I would like to be at sea in a storm but I am all over that & if I ever get on terra firma again I believe I shall be content to stay there let old Neptune alone. I have faithfully paid my respects to him & hope to be excused from any further tribute. My last letter to you was sent ashore by our pilot who left us just outside the capes, Charles & Henry. That was Sunday afternoon, we had no communucations with the world since. The sail to this place, where we arrived Monday afternoon, I enjoyed very much & while very many of the officers around me were sick I was all right, to be sure I took the precaution to keep on deck, but every one was there also. Beginning with the Doctors & the chaplain, one after another bowed their heads to father Neptune until when we cast anchor but five or six of us were left to laugh at the rest and though I was expecting my call continually I did laugh at the rest right heartily. when we anchored Monday afternoon I felt pretty crank that I had gone thru' the two days so well for those who had been at sea before said it had been a faithful trial of our stomachs so I went to the head of the ship pitching & rolling first my head up then my feet, then I would be rolled to one side then the other, there every thing would go from beneath me & then I would be thrown up again & so it contin ued until I went to sleep, but how I did feel when I got up in the morning dizzy & so qualmish (if that is the word) couldn't read a word nor do anything must either stay on deck or lie in your bunk flat on your back & bad enough it was then. until to day I have not done the first thing or read anything at all & to day very little. have been to the table each meal, though some of them I ate mighty little & each day have excercised on deck because I would not give way to it entirely but I have felt miserable enough to day I am much better. Though I am over it much easier than most the others, I do not desire to experience it again, this lying at anchor & pitching & rolling & tumbling is beyond comparison worse than sailing, that did not affect me although it was quite rough as it always is round the cape. How long we are to lie here outside I do not know all the light draught vessels went directly into the sound & we have been expecting to be towed in each day, there are other ships outside with us the great fleet inside are in sight & we long to join them & wonder some - thing is not done if the expedition is intended to surprize the enemy. we know nothing as yet when the blow will be struck or where. The orders that came to us are headed the "Department of No. Carolina". I have written about as long as my head &C will allow to night. It troubles me very much to think how uneasy you probably are about me when I am so entirely safe at present I would like to pay a big bill at any telegraph office if I could let you know as much. But I must stop for to night. Have no idea when this will go or when I shall hear from you again. In fact we know nothing dons even hear from any other vessel once a day. Good night. Monday, Jany 20, 1861 [actually '62] Here we still are tossing about at anchor & when we are to move nobody knows. This morning a tug boat came out to see us & asked how much water we draw & whether we wished to go inside or some such foolish questions & then turned round & went back once every two or three days a tug comes out and asks some questions and this is all the communication we have with the world. The fleet inside we can see across the island about two miles off. we know nothing at all what is going on. There are two other ships at anchor outside distant half a mile or a mile both with troops on board, probably parts of two other Regts as we are part of the 8th. Certainly nothing can be worse for troops than to be placed as we are, all they can do is to gamble & that they keep up from morning to night. I will tell you how the officers are employed as I write in the cabin. The col. is in his bunk flat on his back, the major is on the sofa, the QMaster in bed, the chaplain in his double gown as usual, lying in one of the captains on deck & half a dozen other officers piled round them, and other asleep or trying to sleep on the quarter deck. Dr. Storrs alone is reading - some little song book I believe - While I was writing the last word Dr. Storrs came down & I spoke to him as I have written above, he laughed & Harland calls out that he thinks we all are to day about as nearly used up as ever, then some one else speaks & the Dr goes by. This a pretty fair sample of each day, nothing doing, nothing to do. All have talked out & no one feels like talking It is incomprehensible to me that we are left out here a whole week at anchor tumbling up & down & rolling over & over off this long to be remembered cape Hatteras. I dont see the object in keeping the destination of the expedition secret & then doing nothing here so long, but yet they may be at work at something inside for all I know. I have felt very well to day & have been reading Shirley on deck all the morning. This table tips about so much that writing is decidedly unpleasant. Jany 21, 1862. At last we are inside, that is in Pamlico Sound. Part of the sail coming in was quite exciting as the breakers were on both sides of us & only the narrow channel between. we are now anchored with the rest of the fleet & a big one it is - any number of ships schooners & steamers. we have no large war vessels as I expected, only gunboats carrying from one to five & six guns. I never realized before what it would be to be shut as from this world for two weeks no word from home, no news of any kind, & doing nothing ourselves so you care but it is drill enough particularly as none of us have been entirely recovered from the sea sick sensations There is no news to write & I am sure I can not originate a single word out of my head. There is a schooner near us loaded with horses - wonder if the Governor is aboard - he wont lie worth a pint of beans after being aboard ship two weeks. writing beans above reminds me that we had baked beans for dinner to day but have different from ours at home not sweetened & strongly flavored with onions. I have been intending each day to speak of our major - Appelman - like him very much, he is so unassuming & is very well posted has traveled much. I intend to write a little every day & send when I can. Can see men in a thing on the beach, weather delightful.
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